(Source: astronautjocelyn)
I’m done faking this god damn smile. I really am not happy at all. I’m completely stuck and have no motivation whatsoever to change that. I feel stupid and useless. All I want to do is leave reality for the rest of my life. Fuck.

“Forgive Durden - The Missing Piece” This whole album is one musical and it’s SO beautiful.
actually one of my favorite songs ever
Maybe it’s just me, I don’t really know.. But I feel like I see so much more than everyone else around me. I feed off other peoples energy. If you have bad ones, I’m going to be dying inside and never know why. Really. As stupid as it sounds, I really fucking do. Why do I always surround myself with the people I’m always with? Well, because they HAVE GOOD MOTHER FUCKING VIBES. They may not be the happiest people, but they are good people inside. I know my good friends would never steal, hurt me, or do anything wrong to me. And I love it. But it just upsets me that not everyone else has the same ability that I have. I know!! Again, this sounds so fucking stupid. But ever since I’ve tripped, I feel things sometimes I wish I never felt. But, it does help me in so many ways. It just sucks that seeing people that are so blind and don’t get things. Or feel the energy. IT KILLS ME SO BADLY INSIDE.
OOOOOKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK, I was going to write a lot more personal shit. But I cannot do that on here. Because I have some friends following me and other people that know me. So, I am actually about to open up a third blog! And none of you guys are going to know it :] I need a place to just write out my exact thoughts. And feelings. And yeah. I don’t want any of you to know. hehehehe, ok bye
I don’t spin to do fancy tricks,
I don’t spin to be the best,
I spin my ropes and spheres and sticks,
To abide the tide within my chest.
I don’t spin to be known as cool,
I don’t spin for fame or glory,
I spin for king as well as fool,
to share the essence of my story.
I don’t spin just to teach,
I don’t spin to perform,
I spin to reach,
I spin to grow, to surrender and transform,
I spin to expand the shapes that grow,
In the corners of my mind,
To lead them in an ancient dance,
Older than mankind.
I spin like tiny molecules,
Like giant planets round the sun,
I spin for the unseen force between,
That gathers us and makes us one.
I spin during the night,
I spin during the day,
I spin like everything in sight,
Because I know no other way…
-Tom Thumb